There's the story about the man working the night desk at the FBI office. 
They got a lot of wrong numbers, because it was similar to the pizza 
joint.
One night he answered "FBI." When the caller hesitated, he said "You meant 
to call Dominoes ..." The caller exclaimed "Wow, you guys really DO know 
everything!" 

A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally
zoned when he ran," according to his wife,
accidentally jogged off of a 200-foot-high cliff on his
daily run. 

IDIOTS ON THE ROAD

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it is safe
to cross the street.  I was crossing with an intellectually
challenged coworker of mine(a blonde), when she asked if I knew
what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
She responded, appalled "What on earth are blind people doing
driving?"