There was an old fellow named Rapp 
            Who had a job all considered a snap. 
                In the insane asylum 
                He'd grade cunts and file 'em, 
            And bi-weekly he'd rub up their nap

            To an ancient divine of Tyrone 
            Was the art of rebushing cunts known. 
                In each cunt he would ram 
                A fine, prime raw ham, 
            And then deftly extracted the bone, 

               There once was a boring young Reverend 
               Who preached till it seemed he would never end. 
                    His hearers, en masse, 
                    Got a pain in the ass, 
               And prayed--- for relief of their nether end. 

There was a young girl from Devizes
Who had titz of different sizes
        One was small
        Almost nothing at all
And the other was big, and won prizes.

A lacklustre lady of Brougham 
            Weaveth all night at her loom. 
                Anon she doth blench 
                When her lord and his wench 
            Pull a chain in the neighboring room.