Paul got off the elevator on the 40th floor and nervously
knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and was
as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. 
"I'll be ready in a few minutes," she said. "Why don't you
play with Rollo while you're waiting?" He does wonderful
tricks. He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up and if you
make a hoop with your arms, he'll jump through." 
The dog followed Paul onto the balcony and started rolling
over. Paul made a hoop with his arms and Rollo jumped through
-- and over the balcony railing to the ground 40 floors down.
Just then Paul's date walked out. 

"Isn't Rollo the cutest, happiest dog you've ever seen?" 
"To tell the the truth, " he replied, "he seemed a little
depressed to me." 

Q: Mommy, Mommy! What's an orgasm?
A: I don't know dear, ask your father.

Mrs. Jones is having her house painted, and her husband comes
home from work and leans against the freshly painted wall. 
The next day, she says to the painter, "You wanna see where
my husband put his hand last night?" 
He sighs and says, "Look, lady, I got a tough day's work ahead
of me. Why don't you just make us a cup of tea?"

What is the most insensitive part of a penis? 

    - The man 

    A local United Way office realized that it had never
   received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person
   in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.
   "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000,
   you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the
   community in some way?" The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and
   replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying
   after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her
   annual income?" Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um...no."
   "-or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a
   wheelchair?" The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an
   apology but was interrupted, "-or that my sister's husband died in a
   traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving
   her penniless with three children?" The humiliated United Way rep,
   completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..." On a roll, the
   lawyer cut him off once again: "-so if I don't give any money to them,
   why should I give any to you?"