I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a
few items and the lady behind me put her things on
the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those
"Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and
placed it between our things so they wouldn't get
mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items,
she picked up the "Divider" looking it all over for
the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the
bar code she said to me "Do you know how much this
is?" and I said to her "I've changed my mind, I
don't think I'll buy that today". She said "OK"
and I paid her for the things and left. She had
no clue to what had just happened.....

Finally, Edward tells me about the article concerning the
Pennsylvania Governor's committee to examine violence. The paper 
reported Governor Ridge was especially pleased to annouce that he 
was nominating a "victim of a homicide" to that committee.  Bet 
*that* person won't have much to say.

    This is a true story from the WordPerfect help line.

   Needless to say the help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is
   currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without
   Cause". Actual dialogue of a former Word perfect Customer Support
   employee:
   "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
   "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
   "What sort of trouble?"
   "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
   away."
   "Went away?"
   "They disappeared."
   "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
   "Nothing."
   "Nothing?"
   "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
   "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
   "How do I tell?"
   "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
   "What's a sea-prompt?"
   "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
   "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
   "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
   "What's a monitor?"
   "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it
   have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
   "I don't know."
   "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power
   cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
   "Yes, I think so."
   "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into
   the wall."
   ".......Yes, it is."
   "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two
   cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
   "No."
   "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the
   other cable."
   ".......Okay, here it is."
   "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back
   of your computer."
   "I can't reach."
   "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
   "No."
   "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
   "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's
   dark."
   "Dark?"
   "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in
   from the window."
   "Well, turn on the office light then."
   "I can't."
   "No? Why not?"
   "Because there's a power outage."
   "A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you
   still have the boxes and manuals and packing suff your computer came
   in?"
   "Well, yes, I kee them in the closet."
   "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it
   was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
   from."
   "Really? Is it that bad?"
   "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
   "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
   "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."