The other night I was invited out for a night with "the boys."
I told my wife that I would be home by midnight...promise!
Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy.
At around 3 A.M., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as
I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and
cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick witty
solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.
The next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told
her 12 o'clock.  She didn't seem disturbed at all.  Whew!  Got
away with that one!

She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock.  When I asked
her why she said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times,
then said 'oh shit,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat,
cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
farted.


Sent by Inna

Bachelor Blake had a telephone problem last summer. Some dude who
works a night shift apparently has a phone number almost identical to
Blake's.
Starting around midnight, he'd phone every hour and say, "Hey,
what're you doing there, Mister? Where's my wife?"
Blake'd reply, "You have the wrong number."
The man would snarl suspiciously, "Yeah, I'll bet!" cuss a short streak,
and hang up.
Blake put up with this abuse for exactly three nights. On the fourth
night, when the called and asked, "Hey, what're you doing...," Blake 
interrupted in a frantic screech, "For Pete's sake, call the cops! My wife 
followed me here, she's chasing your wife with an axe, and she's gonna... 
HONEY, DON'T...ARGGGGH!"
The man hollered, "What happened? What? Are you there? Hold on, I'll send 
the police!" The phone clicked, the dial tone came on, and Blake hasn't 
been bothered by night calls since.

ONE THING

When my sister teased her four-year-old daughter by suggesting she liked
a boy in her kindergarten class, the little girl was quite indignant.
"No mummy, I don't" she replied, "because he's only interested in one
thing."

Shocked, my sister cautiously asked what that might be.  "Power Rangers,
of course," said the toddler.

WEiRD 
ALPHA Mailing List