There once was a lady from Hyde,
Who ate a green apple and died,
While her lover lamented,
The apple fermented,
and made cider inside her inside.

In the Garden of Eden lies Adam,
peacefully stroking his madam.
He does so with mirth,
for on all of this Earth,
there were only two tits
and he had 'em! 

There once was a bishop from Nottingham 
            Who stood on a bridge down in Birmingham. 
                He watched all the stunts 
                Of the cunts in the punts 
            And the tricks of the pricks that were fucking
            them. 

There once was a lady from Hyde,
Who ate a green apple and died,
While her lover lamented,
The apple fermented,
and made cider inside her inside.

There was a brave damsel of Brighton 
               Whom nothing could possibly frighten. 
                    She plunged in the sea 
                    And, with infinite glee, 
               Was fucked in the ass by a Triton