There was a young peasant named Gorse 
               Who fell madly in love with his horse. 
                    Said his wife, "You rapscallion, 
                    That horse is a stallion--- 
               This constitutes grounds for divorce." 

There was a young lady who said
As her bridegroom got into bed,
"I'm tired of this stunt
That they do with ones cunt.
Put it up my bottom instead." 

There once was a man from Nepal 
Whose turds were exceedingly small. 
He'd sit in his room 
And shit on a spoon 
And then flick his turds down the hall. 

There was a young lady named Sue 
            Who preferred a stiff drink to a screw. 
                But one leads to the other, 
                And now she's a mother--- 
            Let this be a lesson to you. 

There was a young fellow named Biddle 
               Whose girl had to teach him to diddle. 
                    She grabbed hold of his bow 
                    And said, "If you want to know, 
               You can try parting my hair in the middle."