I tried phone sex once, but the holes were too small.

The doctor looked benignly at the woman who had come to him for an 
examination.
"Mrs. Brown," he said, "I have some good news for you."
The woman said, "I'm glad of that doctor, but I'm Miss Brown,"
"Miss Brown," said the doctor without changing expression, "I have bad 
news for you."

Damn...did you see the size of that front tooth gap she had? Yeah...I 
didn't know wether to smile back or kick a field goal!

A guy calls the hospital. He says, "You gotta send help! My wife's going
into labor!"

The nurse says, "Calm down. Is this her first child?"

He says, "No! This is her husband!"

What kind of Bees make honey?
                                  Honey Bees!
What kind of Bees make Milk?
                                  BOOBIES!