How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travel
bag onto the plane.  Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed to
stuff it in the overhead bin.  "Do you always carry such heavy luggage?" 
she sighed.
"No more," the man said.  "Next time, I'm riding in the bag, and my 
partner can buy the ticket!"

What were Michael Jackson's baby's first words?


                             Which one's Mommy?

Little Harry walks in the bathroom and sees his mum with no clothes on, 
standing in front of him, he looks up at her private parts he asks
"What's that mum ? " His mum frozen tried to think what to say, finally 
she came up with the following, "That's where your dad accidentially hit 
me with an axe!" and little Harry replies, "Good shot, right in the CUNT!"

   Seems God was just about done creating the universe, had a couple of
   left-over things left in his bag of creations, so he stopped by to
   visit Adam and Eve in the Garden.
   
   He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the
   ability to stand up and pee.
   
   "It's a very handy thing," God told the couple who he found hanging
   around under an apple tree. "I was wondering if either one of you
   wanted that ability."
   
   Adam popped a cork, jumped up and begged, "Oh, give that to me! I'd
   love to be able to do that! It seems the sort of thing a Man should
   do. Oh please, oh please, oh please, let me have that ability. It
   would be so great! When I'm working in the garden or naming the
   animals, I could just let it rip, I'd be so cool. Oh please God let it
   be me who you give that gift to, let me stand and pee, oh
   please.........." On and on he went like an excited little boy (who
   had to pee).
   
   Eve just smiled and shook her head at the display. She told God that
   if Adam really wanted it so badly, and it sure seemed to be the sort
   of thing that would make him happy, she really wouldn't mind if Adam
   were the one given the ability to stand up and pee.
   
   And so it was. And it was...well, good.
   
   "Fine," God said, looking back into his bag of left-over gifts. "And
   what do we have left here? Oh yes, multiple orgasms..."