My wife is a primary school teacher, and related this tale after
another class returned from a trip to a working farm: 

My wife asked little David if he had enjoyed the trip. 
"Yes it was great - we saw sheep, horses, goats, and f***ers." 
Wife: "er, fine, fine. I know what the sheep and the rest are,
but what is a f***er?" 
David: "Oh, they're the animals that give us milk" 
Wife: "but who said they were called, er, f***ers?" 
David: "that was our teacher. Well actually she called them
"effers," but we all knew what she meant." 

This is pretty close to an actual sales call I received.
The sales person's name has been changed. The company name
has not. I think we'll stick with our current provider.

Bob: Hello, I'm Bob ______ from AT&T, and I'm calling to let
you know about the Internet services we offer. Do you have a
minute to...
Me: I'm kind of busy right now, but if you could just email me
the information I'll call you back if I'm interested. My address is...
Bob: Could I have your fax number? We're behind a firewall, so our
email doesn't always get through. 

The classically minded among us may have noted a new TV ad for
Microsoft's Internet Explorer e-mail program which uses the
musical theme of the "Confutatis Maledictis" from Mozart's Requiem. 

"Where do you want to go today?" is the cheery line on the screen, while 
the chorus sings "Confutatis maledictis, flammis acribus addictis." For 
those of you who have not studied Latin, this translates to "The damned 
and accursed are consigned to the flames of hell." 

Good to know that Microsoft has done its research!