* It is not what a teenager knows that bothers his parents, it is
       how he found out.

"Only Lawyers and mental defectives are
automatically exempt for jury duty." 

                                            -- George Bernard Shaw

There is not a man in America who at one time or another
hasn't had a secret desire to boot a child in the ass.

     - W. C. Fields 

"He's so unhip that
 When you say Dylan, he thinks you're talking about Dylan Thomas,
 Whoever he was.
 The man ain't got no culture,"

        Paul Simon, "A Simple Desultory Philippic

Never agree to plastic surgery if the doctor's office is full of
portraits by Picasso.