To quote, or not to quote; That is the question. Whether 'tis cluefuller on the Net to re-post The tos and fros of diverse opinions, Or to take arms against such attributions, And, by excision, end them. To trim, to snip: No more, and by a snip to say we end The widows and the thousand orphaned words That posts are heir to, 'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wished. To trim, to snip. To snip, perchance too much. Ay, there's the rub, For in that joyous chop the sense we lose When we have taken out the fluff and dross Must give us pause. There's the factor That makes calamity of so long threads. For who would bear the tos and fros of chat, Th' cascader's screed, the geek's anality, The pain of misplacéd tags, the reeking trolls, The cliquiness of in-jokes, and the flames That studied satire draws from clueless fools, When he himself might his quietus make With a mere bobbit? Who would cudgel brains To write a piece, witty and thoughtful too, But that the hope of making people laugh, That blesséd gift of humour from whose touch No traveller is safe, spurs on the soul, And makes us rather bear those ills we read Than carve them up,and mayhap lose the joke? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all, And thus the native hue of resolution Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought, And Usenet posters of great sense and content In this confusion quote more than they should, And lose the name of Clueful. Read you, now, The fair Emilia! [1] Nymph, in thy reminders Be all my posts remembered.
There once was a woman from France, Who did an unusual dance. She'd roll in the grass, And lick her own ass, Her sex would put men in a trance.
A stingy old man of St. Giles Saved his shillings with miserly wiles. Just to save a few bob He would wipe with a cob, And that way he got piles and piles!
A sweet young strip-dancer named Jane Wore five inches of thin cellophane. When asked why she wore it, She said, "I abhor it, But my cunt juice would spatter like rain."
THE CREATION OF A VAGINA Seven wise men with knowledge so fine Created a pussy to their design. First was a butcher, smart with wit, Using a knife, he gave it a slit. Second was a carpenter, strong and bold, With a hammer and chisel, he gave it a hole. Third was a tailor, tall and thin, By using red velvet, he lined it within. Fourth was a hunter, short and stout, With a piece of fox fur, he lined it without. Fifth was a fisherman, nasty as hell, He threw in a fish and gave it a smell. Sixth was a preacher whose name was McGee, He touched it and blessed it and said it could pee. Last came a sailor, a dirty little runt, He sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt
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