A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory

"hppt:\\\\"
                        -- Clueless spam mail at it's worst

"Despite it's clever disguise the aperture to the right is not actually a
 window, but is a fire exit. _So_ if you want it open, please light this
 waste-paper bin so we aren't breaking the law, and the fire brigade will open
 it for you."
                        -- Paul Gardner-Stephen

DON'T PANIC--in big friendly letters.
        --Douglas Adams

"To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit." 

Enoch Powell.