There was a young student of art 
            Who made a strange anatomical chart: 
                In place of the chest 
                A grease spot on the vest, 
            And in place of the asshole a fart. 

He's teaching her arithmetic, he said it was his mission.
He kissed her once, he kissed her twice and said, "Now that's addition."
And as he added smack by smack, in silent satisfication,
she sweetly gave the kisses back and said, "Now that's subtraction."

Then he kissed her, she kissed him without an explanation.
And both together smiled and said, "That's multiplication."
Then Dad appeared upon the scene and made a quick decision.
He kicked that kid three blocks away and said, "That's long division!"

A gay prison chaplain named Locke
Had a passion for hard convict cock.
For his ass-holey ways
In his alcatraz days,
He was nicknamed the piece of the rock. 

A school marm from old Mississippi
Had a quim that was simply zippy.
The scholars all praised it
Till finally she raised it
To prices befitting a chippy.

There once was a man from Horton,
Who had one long ball and one short one,
To make up for his loss,
He had a cock like a hoss,
And could fart like a 650 Norton.

Sent by Dale