Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90 percent. 

    Wedding cake! 

   A woman with really hairy underarms boards a crowded bus. Unable to
   find a seat, she settles for hanging onto one of the poles.
   
   A drunk man next to her stares at her for three minutes, then tells
   her, "I love a woman that does aerobics."
   
   The woman replies angrily, "I don't DO aerobics!"
   
   The drunk man then looks at the woman and says, "Then how did you get
   your leg up so high?"
   

Good News, Bad News, Worse News IV

  Good: 
        Your son's finally maturing
   Bad: 
        He's involved with the woman next door
 Worse: 
        So are you

A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad 
had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow 
plow and follow it".
Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She 
followed the plow for about forty-five minutes.
Finally the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing.
She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, 
to follow a plow.
The driver nodded and said, "Well, I'm done with Wal-Mart; now you can 
follow me over to K-Mart."

Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good
looking females. One spots a real cutie sitting on a
pile of cow shit and dives down toward her.

"Pardon me" he asks, turning on his best charm,
"...but is this stool taken?"