There was an old lady who lay 
            With her legs wide apart in the hay, 
                Then calling the ploughman, 
                She said, "Do it now, man! 
            Don't wait till your hair has turned gray." 

                    There was a young lady of Bhore
                            
                    Who was courted by gallants galore.
                            Their ardent protestin'
                            She found interestin',
                            
                    And ended her life as a virgin.
                            
                                              

There was a young lady from Munich 
            Who was had in a park by a eunuch. 
                In a moment of passion 
                He shot her a ration 
            From a squirt-gun concealed 'neath his tunic. 

There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who professed to no sexual feeling
Till a cynic named Boris
Just touched her clitoris
And she had to be scraped off the ceiling

A fellow whose surname was Hunt 
               Trained his cock to perform a slick stunt: 
                    This versatile spout 
                    Could be turned inside out, 
               Like a glove, and be used as a cunt.