When Angelico worked in cerise, 
               For the angel he painted his neice. 
                    In a heavenly trance 
                    He pulled off her pants, 
               And erected a fine alter-piece. 

If you're speaking of actions immoral 
               Then how about giving the laurel 
                    To doughty Queen Esther, 
                    No three men could best her--- 
               One fore, one aft, and one oral. 

               There was a young choirboy from Devon 
               Who was raped in a haystack by seven 
                    High Anglican priests--- 
                    (Lascivious beasts)--- 
               For of such is the kingdom of heaven 

There was an old spinster of Tyre
Who bellowed, "MY CUNT IS ON FIRE!"
So a fireman was found,
Brought his engine around
And extinguished her burning desire

There was a young girl of Cohoes
               Who jerked herself off with her nose. 
                    She said, "Yes, I done it, 
                    But just for the fun it 
               Afforded the folk of Cohoes."