A proper young person named Gissing 
            Announced he had given up kissing. 
                "I strike out at once 
                For something that counts, 
            And besides my girl's front teeth are missing." 

There once was a man from Horton,
Who had one long ball and one short one,
To make up for his loss,
He had a cock like a hoss,
And could fart like a 650 Norton.

Sent by Dale

A Cajun gourmet named LaSalle,
Is the chef at dat place on Canal.
He put lotta spice
On your red beans an' rice,
And make lightnin' shoot outta your bowel! 

Everything is gone;

Your life's work has been destroyed.

Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?

There is a professor named Martin 
                                        From whom I'm about to be partin', 
                                                      And on my way out, 
                                                      He may here me shout, 
                                        "It's your face I'd sure like to fart in."