"Spell 'Paranoia'"
"I can't! I'm diabetic! It means I can't spell!"
                        -- me, a very drunk guy at a party

"I think if we all acted the way we really felt, four out of eight people 
at a dinner table would be sitting there sobbing." 

-- Jim Carrey on the human condition in the London Observer.

Sex is the most fun I have ever had -- without laughing.

     - Woody Allen 

If God had intended us to drink beer,
He would have given us stomachs. 

     - David Daye 

"I'm convinced that, if you could decode the 'unused' bits of our DNA,
 they'd read:

        This is a test, please ignore

 or perhaps:

        The Elder Ones make no warranty of any kind with regard to
        this material, including, but not limited to, the implied
        warranties or merchantability and fitness for a particular
        purpose"
                        -- Malcolm Ray, uhaa032@sun.rhbnc.ac.uk