There once was a gangster named Brown,
The wiliest bastard in town.
He was caught by the G-men
Shooting his semen
Where the cops would all slip and fall down. 

               There was a young man from Bangore 
               Who was tired and said to his whore, 
                    "If you'll only roll over 
                    I'll get my dog Rover, 
               And you can have six inches more." 

               I'd willingly fertilize Mary, 
               And watch for nine months her shape vary, 
                    From the very first day, 
                    To the child-birth display, 
               When her tits would turn into a dairy. 

            There was a young brother monastic 
            Whose penis was somewhat elastic. 
                So when it uncoiled, 
                With a snap it recoiled, 
            Interrupting his studies scholastic. 

There was a young lassie named Phyllis 
               Was deflowered one night in a Willys. 
                    Before they were through 
                    Her spine was askew, 
               And I very much fear that it still is.