There was a young man from Hong Kong 
               Who had a trifurcated prong: 
                    A small one for sucking, 
                    A large one for fucking, 
               And a honey for beating a gong. 

There was a young fellow whose dong
Was prodigiously massive and long.
On each side of his whang
Two testes did hang
That attracted a curious throng.

There was an old man of Madrid 
            Who went to an auction to bid. 
                In the first lot they sold 
                Was an ancient commode--- 
            And, my God, when they lifted the lid! 

My back aches, my pussy is sore,
I simply can't fuck any more,
I'm covered with sweat,
And you haven't come yet,
And my God, it's a quarter to four!

   Here I sit
   What a caper
   I have to shit
   But I'm out of paper