Olympic ice skater Oksana Baiul was recently arrested for driving
under the influence of alcohol. Her BAC was rated at: 

0.168   0.165   0.167   0.169   0.165  0.166   0.099
 USA     CAN     JAP     ITY     SWE    CHI     RUS

The Democratic National Committee finally released thousands
of pages of financial disclosure information. Says Vince Vieceli,
"Unfortunately, they released them from a third-floor balcony in
New York during the parade for the Yankees." 

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the boys."
I told my wife that I would be home by midnight...promise!
Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy.
At around 3 A.M., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home. Just as
I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and
cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another
9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick witty
solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.
The next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told
her 12 o'clock.  She didn't seem disturbed at all.  Whew!  Got
away with that one!

She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock.  When I asked
her why she said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times,
then said 'oh shit,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat,
cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then
farted.


Sent by Inna