Those German controllers at Frankfurt Airport tend to be a 
short-tempered lot. They not only expect pilots to know their 
parking location but how to get there without any assistance. 

So it was with some amusement that we (PanAm 747) listened 
to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground and a 
British Airways 747 (radio call Speedbird 206) after landing.

Speedbird 206: "Good morning Frankfurt. Speedbird 206 clear 
to active."

Ground: "Good Morning. Taxi to your gate."

The British Airways 747 pulls onto the main taxiway and stops.

Ground: "Speedbird, do you know where you are going?"

Speedbird 206: "Stand by, ground. I'm looking up the gate 
location now."

Ground (impatiently): "Speedbird 206, have you never flown to 
Frankfurt before?"

Speedbird 206 (coolly), "Yes, in 1944. But I didn't stop."

Laborer Alexander Robinson of Mobile, Alabama,
redefined the limits of tactlessness when he
opened his eyes after surgery to restore his
sight and said agreeably to his wife: 'Boy,
you sure have got fat in four years.'

Miss Canada 1996, Danielle House, got into a bar fight and was
charged with assault after allegedly causing bodily harm to
another woman. Says Jerry Perisho: "The other day I went to a
Canadian beauty pageant and a hockey game broke out."