"Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to
   prison for three years, not Princeton."
   -Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again
   with promoter Don King

ON EXPLANATION OF THE END
   "... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that,
   lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of
   their C programs."
        -- Robert Firth

Eat less fresh food. Eat more things containing preservatives.
Preservatives are called preservatives because they help you live longer.

I haven't a particle of confdence in a man who has no redeeming petty 
vices.

                                                --Mark Twain

   Don't look now!
   You're pissing on your neighbors foot!