I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian
   because I hate plants.
   -- A. Whitney Brown

        Vows begin when hope dies.
                
                           --Leonardo da Vinci

"Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get appointed
   as an assistant professor. It is for a woman schlemiel to get as
   quickly promoted as a male schlemiel."
   --- Bella Abzug

What do you mean, funny?  Funny-peculiar
or funny-ha-ha?
                                -- Ian Hay, THE HOUSEMASTER,
                                   Act III (1936).

* Marriage is not just having a wife but also worries inherited
       forever.