A girl on a southern plantation
                            
                    Was the product of insemination.
                            So each fathers' day
                            She would send a bouquet
                            
                    To a syringe in a far away nation.
                            

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Eyed the girls and had a ball,
Lots of whistles, even a catcall,
Thus... Humpty had a great fall!

Then came the cold winter breeze
and Humpty's arse began to freeze...
though winter's sure to be a dreary thing... 
Let's wish Humpty a bouncy spring!

An agreeable girl named Miss Doves
Likes to jack off the young men she loves.
     She will use her bare fist
     If the fellows insist
But she really prefers to wear gloves.

There was a young lady whose thighs,
When spread showed a slit of such size,
And so deep and so wide,
You could play cards inside---
Much to her bridegroom's surprise.

                    A geneticist living in Delft
                            
                    Scientifically played with himself,
                            And when he was done
                            He labeled it: Son,
                            
                    And filed it away on the shelf.