There was a young girl of Tonga
Used to diddle herself with a conga.
When asked how it feels
To be pleasured by eels,
She said, "just like a man, only longer." 

                    There once a woman from Clover
                            
                    Who really enjoyed to bend over.
                            When a guy got behind her
                            Jumped all up inside her
                            
                    And fucked 'til the whole day was over.
                            

There was an announcer named Herschel 
               Whose habits became controversial, 
                    Because when out wooing 
                    Whatever he was doing 
               At ten he'd insert his commercial. 

A horrid old lady of Summit, 
               Every time she got laid had to vomit, 
                    And although she would groan 
                    When her man got a bone, 
               "Give it here," she would say, "and I'll gum it!" 

There once was a lady, Ilene,
Who liver on distilled kerosene,
But she started absorbin'
A new hydrocarbon
and since then she'd never benzene