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Today's stories[2.11.03]

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The re-release of George Lucas' "Star Wars" raked in millions. "This came as a relief to Princess Leia who had fallen on hard times and was considering becoming a spokeswoman for Weight Watchers and Ocean Spray." (Joshua Sostrin) Says Paul Ecker, "Teenagers all over the country are asking the same question: Who's Mark Hamil?" The film was enhanced with even more special effects. "In a related move, Sweden will re-release Ingmar Bergman's films "enhanced with even more gloom,'" (Michael Edens)
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My friend was always teasing me about cybersex and trying to lead me on. One day he wrote a really racy letter so I decided to "call his bluff". Forgetting I'd deleted his letter out of habit, I accidently responded to my Recipe Du Jour list instead and wrote: "Thanks a lot. Now I can't get any work done. My panties are wet from the anticipation of your next email." A gentleman wrote back: "Sorry, I didn't realize salsa had such an effect."
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One guy was trying to fix a blocked pipe under the sink. He disconnected the pipe and put a bucket under the basin to catch all of the water. While he was working, he realized the bucket was getting full so he took the bucket and emptied back in the sink again
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