To his bride a young bridegroom said, "Pish! 
            Your cunt is as big as a dish!" 
                She replied, "Why, you fool, 
                With your limp little tool 
            It's like driving a nail with a fish!" 



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1 


To the shrine which was Pallas Athena's 
            Young Bito (who'd learned about penis) 
                Brought her needles and thread 
                And scissors and said, 
            "You can stick them---I'm changing to Venus!" 



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2 


A lad from far-off Transvaal 
            Was lustful, but tactful withal. 
                He'd say, just for luck, 
                "Mam'selle, do you fuck?" 
            But he'd bow till he almost would crawl. 



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3 


There was a young lady of Joppa
            Who came a society cropper. 
                She went to Ostend 
                With a gentlemen friend--- 
            The rest of the story's improper. 



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4 


A contortionist hailing from Lynch 
            Used to rent out his tool by the inch. 
                A foot cost a quid--- 
                He could and he did 
            Stretch it to three in a pinch. 



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5