If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
Paddy wanted to be an accountant, so he went for an aptitude test. Tester: If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits, and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got? Paddy: Seven! Tester: No, listen carefully again. If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits, and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got? Paddy: Seven! Tester: Let's try this another way. If I give you two bottles of beer, two bottles of beer, and another two bottles of beer, how many bottles of beer have you got? Paddy: Six. Tester: Good! Now, if I give you two rabbits, two rabbits, and another two rabbits, how many rabbits have you got? Paddy: Seven! Tester: How on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits is seven? Paddy : I've already got one rabbit at home!
The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact that WonTon spelled backwards is Not Now.
Why don't Jewish mothers drink? Alcohol interferes with their suffering.
Two Tourists Two tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee. "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly? The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said, Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing."