The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing.
   -- Dizzy Dean explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a
   ball in the 1934 World Series

"Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone, but when
 she got there the cupboard was bare so THE POOR MONGREL STARVED TO DEATH!!"
                        -- Flacco, "DAAS Kapital"

One more drink and I'd be under the host. 

     - Parker 

"If infinite rednecks fired infinite shotguns at an infinite number of road
 signs, they'd eventually create all the great literary works of the world in
 braille."
                        -- Discordian Quote File

There was an accident betwen a Thunderbird and a Mustang, 
Horseshit and feathers everywhere.