On the wall of a church was a sign:
"If you are tired of sin, come to see us!"

And right below it in nice rounded letters;
"But if you're not, my phone number is 341 3451" 

A lady walks in a computer store one day with a box of 5 1/2 inch disks,
says "I bought these disks and they seem to be defective."
"So", says the salesman, "what type of computer do you have?"
"An Apple," says she.
So fine, he says, and takes her over to a IIe...
"Oh, not this one," she said, "I own one of those!" And points to a Mac.
(at this point the salesman, as you do, saw where this was going, and
refused to believe it.)
"Well," says the salesman "these are 5 1/2 inch disks, they won't won't 
fit in one of those..."
"Oh, I made them fit." Says the woman.
Needless to say, she had taken a pair of scissors...

Matsushita Electric is promoting a new Japanese PC targeted
at the Internet. Panasonic has developed a complete Japanese
Web browser, and to make the system "user-friendly", licensed
the cartoon character "Woody Woodpecker" as the "Internet
guide." Panasonic eventually planned on a world version of the
product. 

A huge marketing campaign was to have introduced the product in
Japan last week. The day before the ads were to be released,
Panasonic suddenly pulled back and delayed the product launch
indefinitely. 

The reason: the ads featured the slogan "Touch Woody - The Internet
Pecker." An American staff member at the internal product launch
explained to the stunned and embarrassed Japanese what "touch woody"
and "pecker" meant in American slang. 

     -From EE Times, October 8, 1996