A sempstress at Epping-on-Tyne 
            Used to peddle her tail down the line. 
                She first got a crown, 
                But her prices went down--- 
            Now she'll fit you for ten pence or nine. 

               Each man that Miss Jones chose to wed with, 
               She first liked to paint the town red with, 
                    For having made merry, 
                    She then became very 
               Aroused and fantastic in bed with. 

There was a young man of Madras 
            Who was having a boy in the grass. 
                Then a cobra-capello 
                Said, "Hello, young fellow!" 
            And bit a piece out of his ass. 

On May Day the girls of Penzance, 
               Being bored by the lack of romance, 
                    Joined the workers' parade 
                    With this banner displayed: 
               "What the Pants of Penzance Need is Ants." 
                                                 

                    A studious professor named Nestor
                            
                    Bet a whore all his books he could best her.
                            But she drained out his balls
                            And skipped up the walls,
                            
                    Beseeching poor Nestor to rest her.