How to Hunt Elephants -- Comp Sci Style
 
Computer scientists hunt elephants using algorithm A:
 
1.  Go to Africa
2.  Start at the Cape of Good Hope
3.  Work northward in an orderly manner, traversing the
    continent alternately East and West.
4.  During each traverse
        a.  Catch each animal seen
        b.  Compare each animal caught to a known elephant
        c.  Stop when a match is detected.
 
Experienced computer programmers modify Algorithm A by
placing a known elephant in Cairo to ensure that the
algorithm will terminate.
 
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How to hunt elephants -- Lawyer's style

Lawyers don't hunt elephants, but they do follow the herds
around arguing about who owns the droppings.  Software
lawyers will claim that they own an entire herd based on the
look and feel of one dropping.

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How to Hunt Elephants -- VP Style

When the Vice President of R&D tries to hunt elephants, his
staff will try to ensure that  all elephants are completely
prehunted before he sees them.  If the VP sees a
nonprehunted elephant, the staff will (1) Compliment the
vice president's keen eyesight and (2) enlarge itself to
prevent any recurrence.

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How to Hunt Elephants -- Sales Style

Salespeople don't hunt elephants but spend their time
selling elephants they haven't  caught, for delivery two
days before the season opens.  Software salespeople ship the
first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an
elephant.  Hardware salespeople catch rabbits, paint them
gray and sell them as "desktop elephants."

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Father Goose Story No. 4

It seems that Mary Poppins has moved to California.  Yep,
she has started a business telling people's fortunes.  But, she
doesn't read palms or tea leaves, she smells one's breath.
That, right, the sign outside reads:

        Super California Mystic
           Expert Halitosis




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