There was a young fellow named Gluck 
               Who found himself shit out of luck. 
                    Though he petted and wooed, 
                    When he tried to get screwed 
               He found virgins just don't give a fuck. 



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1 


A widow who lived in Rangoon 
               Hung a black-ribboned wreath on her womb, 
                    "To remind me," she said, 
                    "Of my husband who's dead, 
               And of what put him into his tomb." 



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2 


There was a young man from Darjeeling 
               Whose dong reached up to the ceiling. 
                    In the electric light socket 
                    He'd put it and rock it--- 
               Oh God! What a wonderful feeling! 



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3 


In the quaint English village of Worcester 
               Lived a little red hen and a rooster. 
                    A coquettish glance 
                    She acquired in Framce 
               Gave him ants in his pants, and he goosed her. 



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4 



               There once was a fellow named Siegel 
               Who attempted to bugger a beagle, 
                    But the mettlesome bitch 
                    Turned and said with a twitch, 
               "It's fun, but you know it's illegal." 



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5