There was a sad prude out in Iowa 
               Who would say, "Please say it my way: 
                    Do not say fuck, 
                    It don't rhyme with duck. 
               Say untcay and itshay and uckfay." 



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1 


A shiftless young fellow of Kent 
               Had his wife fuck the landlord for rent. 
                    But as she grew older, 
                    The landlord grew colder, 
               And now they live out in a tent. 



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2 


There was a young man of Adair 
               Who thought he would diddle a mare. 
                    He climbed up a ladder 
                    And jolly well had her, 
               With his backside a-wave in the air. 



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3 


There was a young fellow named Charteris 
               Put his hand where his young lady's garter is. 
                    She said, "I don't mind, 
                    And up higher you'll find 
               The place where my fucker and farter is." 



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4 




               Said Senator David I. Walsh, 
               "These charges against me are false. 
                    Though I did go to Brooklyn 
                    For sooklyn and fooklyn, 
               Not a gob laid his hands on my balsh." 



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