What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness and an atheist?

Someone who knocks on your door for no reason whatsoever.
If God is dead, then what are they giving out at communion?



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1 


Whats the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vaccum? 

     - With a vaccum, the dirtbags on the inside 



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2 



What is the last thing Jesus Christ said to the Teamsters?

"Don't do anything 'till I get back." 



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3 


So it seems that these four rabbis had a series of theological 
arguments, and three were always in accord against the fourth. 
One day, the odd rabbi out, after the usual "3 to 1, majority 
rules" statement that signified that he had lost again, decided 
to appeal to a higher authority.

"Oh, God!" he cried. "I know in my heart that I am right and 
they are wrong! Please give me a sign to prove it to them!"

It was a beautiful, sunny day. As soon as the rabbi finished his 
prayer, a storm cloud moved across the sky above the four. It 
rumbled once and dissolved. "A sign from God! See, I'm right, I 
knew it!" But the other three disagreed, pointing out that storm 
clouds form on hot days.

So the rabbi prayed again: "Oh, God, I need a bigger sign to 
show that I am right and they are wrong. So please, God, a 
bigger sign!"  This time four storm clouds appeared, rushed 
toward each other to form one big cloud, and a bolt of lightning 
slammed into a tree on a nearby hill.

"I told you I was right!" cried the rabbi, but his friends insisted 
that nothing had happened that could not be explained by 
natural causes.

The rabbi was getting ready to ask for a *very big* sign, but just 
as he said, "Oh God...," the sky turned pitch black, the earth 
shook, and a deep, booming voice intoned, "HEEEEEEEE'S 
RIIIIIIIGHT!"

The rabbi put his hands on his hips, turned to the other three, 
and said, "Well?"

"So," shrugged one of the other rabbis, "now it's 3 to 2." 





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4 


A horse wanders into a bar and orders a tall one.
The bartender says, "Hey fella, why the long face?" 



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5