Unix Man -- by Beatles
--------

He's a real UNIX Man
Sitting in his UNIX LAN
Making all his UNIX .plans
For nobody.

Knows the blocksize from du(1)
Cares not where /dev/null goes to
Isn't he a bit like you
And me?

UNIX Man, please listen(2)
My lpd(8) is missin'
UNIX Man
The wo-o-o-orld is at(1) your command.

He's as wise as he can be
Uses lex and yacc and C
UNIX Man, can you help me
At all?

UNIX Man, don't worry
Test with time(1), don't hurry
UNIX Man
The new kernel boots, just like you had planned.

He's a real UNIX Man
Sitting in his UNIX LAN
Making all his UNIX .plans
For nobody ...
Making all his UNIX .plans
For nobody.



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1 


Computer Eleanor Rigby
-------------
Eleanor Rigby
Sits at the keyboard
And waits for a line on the screen
Lives in a dream
Waits for a signal
Finding some code
That will make the machine do some more.
What is it for?

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?

Guru MacKenzie
Typing the lines of a program that no one will run;
Isn't it fun?
Look at him working,
Munching some chips as he waits for the code to compile;
It takes a while...

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?

Eleanor Rigby
Crashes the system and loses 6 hours of work;
Feels like a jerk.
Guru MacKenzie
Wiping the crumbs off the keys as he types in the code;
Nothing will load.

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?
=================================================



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2 



               A young man from the banks of the Po 
               Found his cock had elongated so, 
                    That when he'd pee 
                    It was not he 
               But even his neighbors who'd know. 



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3 



               There was a young choirboy from Devon 
               Who was raped in a haystack by seven 
                    High Anglican priests--- 
                    (Lascivious beasts)--- 
               For of such is the kingdom of heaven 



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4 



               There was a young lady named Flynn 
               Who thought fornication a sin, 
                    But when she was tight 
                    It seemed quite all right, 
               So everyone filled her with gin. 



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5