First snake:I hope I'm not poisonous.

Second snake:Why?

First snake:Because I bit my lip!



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1 



A young man fell in a pit one day, and found a 
magic lamp with a genie inside of it. The genie 
said, 'I will grant you three wishes.' The man's 
first wish was to get out of the pit. **POOF** 
He was instantly transported out. He then wished 
for all the gold in the world. **POOF** 
The genie gave him all the gold nuggets in the 
world, all the gold bars, all the gold pebbles, 
etc. The man could not think of anything for his 
third wish, so he went out for a ride in his 
Ferrari. He turned on the radio, and after a few 
minutes, his favorite song came on. He decided to 
sing along: 
'Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Weiner...' 




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2 


Once some boys got together to play poker one 
night, after about 4 hours of playing, Tim had 
severe chest pains and suddenly slumped over, one 
of the gamblers who happened to be a doctor, 
examined him, and to everybodies shock, poor Tim 
had died of a heart attack.
All his friends didn't know how to break the news 
to his wife, finally Johnny said: 'I can be 
diplomatic about it and break the news gently!'.
Johnny rang the bell at Tim's house, and when his 
wife answered the door, he calmly said to her: 
'Tim just gambled with us and lost 1,000 dollars!' 
When Tim's wife heard this she said: 'Tell him to 
just drop dead!' 
Johnny answered: 'That's exactly what he did!'.



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3 


What do West Virginians call a pretty woman?


                    A tourist.



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4 


What is New Jersey's state bird?


                    The common House Fly.



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5