There was an old maid in Van Nuys 
               Who went crazy from making mud pies. 
                    She would fill them with farts 
                    And pickled beef-hearts, 
               And bake them between her fierce thighs. 



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1 



               A depraved old Jew from Estretto 
               Buggered every young man in the ghetto. 
                    He once had his hose in 
                    A musician, composing, 
               Who said: "Not so slow---allegretto!" 

(Yeah, I know it's nasty...)



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2 


There once was a geologist named Wassal, 
            Who one day found a colossal fossil. 
                He could tell by the bend, 
                And the knob at the end, 
            That it was the peter of Paul, the apostile. 



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There was a young person of Kent            
Who was famous wherever he went. 
All the way through a fuck 
He would quack like a duck, 
And he crowed like a cock when he spent. 



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4 


A shapely young lady name Jenna 
            Colored her pubics with henna. 
                On a beach she was crude 
                And sunbathed in the nude. 
            She was promptly invited to dinner. 



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5