What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups? Put the remote control between his toes. Send this joke to a friend 1 How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work. Send this joke to a friend 2 What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? You didn't hold the pillow down long enough. Send this joke to a friend 3 Here's a sick one... So at the funeral home, the widow instructs the mortician to cut off her late husband's penis and shove it up his rectum. The mortician objects, but threatening not to pay, he relents. Later, at the coffin closing, the wife bends down to kiss her husband goodbye, and she sees a tear coming from his eye. She says "Hurts doesn't it, you son of a bitch!" Send this joke to a friend 4 Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, "Bill, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautiful country, and on each house I saw a banner." "What did it say on the banners?" Clinton asks. Saddam replies, "Allah is god, god is Allah." Clinton says, "You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner." "What could you see on the banners?" Saddam asks. Clinton replies, "I don't know. I can't read Hebrew." Send this joke to a friend 5
