Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Send this joke to a friend 1 Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. Send this joke to a friend 2 A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. "Where are you?" the man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh yeah?" the man asked..."And where were you when I got married?" Send this joke to a friend 3 Homer: Boy, you don't have to follow in my footsteps. Bart: Don't worry, I don't even like using the bathroom after you. Homer: Why you little -- ! Send this joke to a friend 4 A fifth grader looked downcast, so her teacher asked, "What's the problem, Carol? I hope it's not homework again." "Well, uh, yes, it is." replied Carol. "I was stupid and made my homework paper into a paper airplane." "Carol, you're right, that wasn't a very bright thing to do," said the teacher, "but this once I'll let you just unfold the paper and hand it in." "Oh, but that won't work," said Carol, looking even sadder. "You see, the plane was hijacked." Send this joke to a friend 5
