A young, ruthless executive died and went to hell. When he got there, he saw one sign that said Capitalist Hell, and another that said Socialist Hell. In front of the Socialist Hell was an incredibly long line, while there was no-one in front of the Capitalist Hell. So the executive asked the guard, "What do they do to you in Socialist Hell?" "They boil you in oil, whip you, and then put you on the rack," the guard replied. "And what do they do to you in Capitalist Hell?" "The same exact thing," the guard answered. "Then why is everybody in line for Socialist Hell?" "Because in Socialist Hell, they're always out of oil, whips, and racks!" Send this joke to a friend 1 Little Johnny is in class. The teacher is going through the alphabet, having each child think up a word that starts with a letter. They get to "W", and the teacher figures Little Johnny can't think up anything dirty with a "W" so she calls on him. "Womb!", Little Johnny says. "That's a good word, Johnny", teacher says. "Is that as in where babies come from?" she asks. "No", says Johnny, "That's the sound elephants make when they're screwing... you know, "Womb! Womb! Womb!" Send this joke to a friend 2 What's the difference between a Jewish Mother and a Rottweiler? Eventually the Rottweiler lets go! Send this joke to a friend 3 An Irish man went to the courthouse to change his name legally changed. When he replied, the desk clerk asked "Can i help you sir?" Our man said "Yes, I would like to change my name." "What is your current name?" asked the clerk. "Martin Arsehole," replied the man. The clerk laughed, and said "I can see why you want a change. What would you like your new name to be?" "Tim." Send this joke to a friend 4 What do you call a gay Indian? A brave sucker! Send this joke to a friend 5