There was a young lad from Nahant
                            
                    Who was made like the Sensitive Plant.
                            When asked, "Do you fuck?"
                            He replied, "No such luck.
                            
                    I would if I could but I can't."
                            




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1 



                    There was a young girl named Maxine
                            
                    Whose vagina was wondrously clean:
                            With her uterus packed
                            She kept safe from attack
                            
                    With a dill pickle, papulous, green.
                            




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2 



                    A lonely young lad of Eton
                            
                    Used always to sleep with the heat on,
                            Till he ran into a lass
                            Who showed him her ass---
                            
                    Now they sleep with only a sheet on.
                            




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3 



                    You've heard of the Duchess of York,
                            
                    She's twice been blessed by the stork.
                            The Duke will fuck
                            Naught else but a duck,
                            
                    While the Duchess she frequents the park.
                            
                                              




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4 



                    For the prick-naming prize of Pinole
                            
                    This year's winner was Daniel O'Dole.
                            He will tell you with bonhommie,
                            "I call mine 'Metonymy,'
                            
                    Because it's a part for the whole."
                            




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5