There once was a fiesty young terrier
Who liked to bite girls on the derriere.
He'd yip and he'd yap,
Then leap up and snap;
And the fairer the derriere the merrier.



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1 


There was a young girl of Darjeeling
Who could dance with such exquisite feeling.
There was never a sound
For miles around,
Save of fly-buttons hitting the ceiling. 



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2 


There was a young lady named Clair
Who possessed a magnificent pair.
Or at least so I thought,
Till I saw one get caught
On a thorn, and began losing air.



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3 


There was a girl from the five and ten
Who diddled herself with a fountain pen.
The top came off,
The ink went wild,
And now she's the mother of a coloured child.



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4 


An efficient young fellow named Dave
Said, "Think of the time that I save
By avoiding vacations,
And sexy relations,
And taking a crap while I shave." 



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5