Did you hear about the Polish Navy's tragic accident?
A hundred and thirty-seven sailors drowned trying to push-start
their new submarine.






Send this joke to a friend

1 


Young Amanpreet never quite got over his miserable 
childhood as an orphan in the ghetto.  When he turned 18 he
joined the Marines, but old habits die hard and one night the
sergeant found him rummaging around the garbage and eating
out of the discarded cans and jars.

"On your free, Lizard Pecker," he bellowed.  "You'll eat in 
the message hall -- you're no better than the rest of us!"



Send this joke to a friend

2 


Mrs. Schmidlap hires a maid with beautiful blonde hair.  The 
first morning, the girl pulls off the hair and says, "I wear a wig, 
because I was born totally hairless. Not a hair on my body, not 
even down there." 

That night, Mrs. Schmidlap tells her husband.  He says, "I've 
never seen anything like that.  Please tomorrow, ask her to go
into the bedroom and show you.  I want to hide in the closet so 
I can have a look."  

The next day, Mrs. Schmidlap asks the girl, the two of them go 
into the bedroom, and the girl strips and shows her.
Then the girl says, "I've never seen one with hair on it.  Can I 
see yours?"

So Mrs. Schmidlap pulls off her clothes and shows her.  That 
night, Mrs. Schmidlap says to her husband, "I hope you're  
satisfied, because I was pretty embarrassed when that girl 
asked to see mine." 

Her husband says, "You think you were embarrassed...I had 
the four guys I play poker with in the closet with me." 



Send this joke to a friend

3 


Jessica was toweling off in front of the mirror when she noticed a few
   gray pubic hairs. She bent down and said to her privates... "I know
   you haven't been getting much lately...but I didn't know you were so
   worried about it!"




Send this joke to a friend

4 


The Master Chief was inspecting the barracks and he
overheard one terrified recruit whisper, "Master Chief Barnes
has the heart of a tiny child . . . on his desk . . . in a jar."

Without missing a beat, Master Chief Barnes snarled, 
"Goddamned if they don't find out EVERY little thing about
you!"





Send this joke to a friend

5