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A priest is teaching a nun how to swim and the nun says to the priest "Will I really sink if you take your finger out?"
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1
An Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ft. when he spies a field mouse down below him. He dives down and eats the mouse. After a little while the mouse works his way out the eagles butt. Proceeding to look around the mouse says: "Tail gunner to pilot...Tail gunner to pilot.." The eagle says "what do you want?" The mouse asks how high up they are. The eagle thinks for a moment and then says "ohh about 5,000 ft." The mouse then replies "You wouldn't be shittin me now would ya??"
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2
President Clinton to maid: Mam, can you do something about Hillary's room. She complains that it's the ugliest room in the White House. Maid: Yes, Mr. President--I'll remove the mirrors right away.
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3
This guy goes ice fishing, takes out an auger and starts drilling. LOUD VOICE FROM ABOVE: There's no fish there. Guy goes to another spot and drills. LOUD VOICE FROM ABOVE: There's no fish there, either. Guy tries a third spot. LOUD VOICE FROM ABOVE: Nope. Not there either. Guy, getting a little nervous: "Are you God? LOUD VOICE FROM ABOVE: No. I'm the arena manager.
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4
Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book? A: It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing
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5
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