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There was a young man from Aberdeen
Who invented a jerking machine.
On the twenty-fifth stroke
The goddamn thing broke
And beat his balls into a cream.
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1
A bobby of Nottingham Junction
Whose organ had long ceased to function
Deceived his good wife
For the rest of her life
With the aid of a constable's truncheon.
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2
There was a young singer named Springer,
Got his testicles caught in a wringer.
He hollered in pain
As they rolled down the drain,
(falsetto): "There goes my career as a singer!"
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3
MY SPELL CHECKER
I have a spell checker
It came with my PC
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot see
Eye ran this poem threw it
Your sure real glad two no
Its very polished in its own weigh
My chequer tolled me sew
A cheek or is a blessing
It freeze yew lodes of thyme
It helps me right awl stiles two reed
And aides me when aye rime
Now spilling does not phase me
It does knot bring a tier
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped words fare as hear
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should be proud
And wee mussed dew the best wee can
Sew flaws are knot aloud
So ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want to please
Author Unknown
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4
There was a young man named Zerubbabel
Who had only one real, and one rubber ball.
When they asked if his pleasure
Was only half measure,
He replied, "That is highly improbable."
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5
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