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"Excellent, there's nothing quite like a blunt object to reinforce proper administration ethics." -- Simon Travaglia
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"I still have my health. *thok* I still have my health. *thok* I still have my health." -- Ally McBeal on lost love
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"Apparently giving caffeine to spiders makes them spin really bad webs, whereas giving them LSD makes them more uniform and better. Imagine what the WWW would have been like if it had been invented in the 60's" -- Unknown, alt.sysadmin.recovery
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"Keeping UUCP running is starting to seem a lot like keeping a 130-year-old man who smokes 4 packs a day on life support because he's the last person on Earth who knows how to do the cha-cha, but he won't tell anyone." -- Ryan Tucker, alt.sysadmin.recovery
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"By ten I was so wasted I had been officially downgraded to a lower rung on the evolutionary ladder. Some guy in a suit came up, listened to my attempts to string words together, revoked my rights as Homo Sapiens on the spot and reclassified me as some kind of plant life. I had to fill in all kinds of forms and shit. It was very embarrassing." -- Michael Marshall Smith, "Spares"
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