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A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally
swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no
ill effects, so he forgot about it.
Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions,
undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he
looked up the man's arse was that eye staring right back at him.
"You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."
Send this joke to a friend 1 Little Johnny was late for school. When he finally got there
his teacher asked,
"Why are you late little Johnny?"
Johnny replied, "My grandpa got burnt, Miss."
The teacher replied, "I hope it wasn't too bad."
Then little Johnny said, "Don't worry, the crematorium doesn't
muck around!"
Send this joke to a friend 2 Q: What is worse than a dead dog on your piano?
A: An infected pussy on your organ.
Send this joke to a friend 3 A young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kilt.
"Reach up there and find out."
She did, but quickly pulled her hand back out and said, "Oh, it's
gruesome!"
"Aye, it has," replied the Scotsman, "and if you put your hand back
up there, it'll grow some more!"
Send this joke to a friend 4 Q: How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
Send this joke to a friend 5